Mermaid Hair!

Yes, you read that right. Think less Ariel and more one of her slutty sisters, though. Who wouldn’t want to rock long, flowy, diva-of-the-sea locks?

Probably just bitches with no souls.

So there’s a new kit hitting salons and stores next month from hair guru Kevin Murphy that gives you the all in one treatment. It includes: texture spray, wave clips, pin clips, & a texture net so you too can achieve those perfect “photoshoot at the beach” waves. And gurl, I NEEDZ it, because I usually end up emerging from the ocean looking more like this:

aka, Ursula's understudy

Than this:

Screw having part of your world, I want part of your hair!!!

Honestly Ariel, between hoarding whozits and whatszits galore & doing back alley deals with ocean monsters, I don’t know where you find the time to keep your hair so fab. Bitch.


Products we’re excited for!

Every now and then, a new product is announced that makes our hearts go pitter-patter. This month, our pick at ATWOM is Keratin Earth’s natural straightening solution.

My hair follicles are possibly ovulating at the thought.

Keratin Earth’s system comes with a 4-product system: the shampoo, the straightening therapy, the nourishing masque, and lastly, the protein conditioner. The products, when used correctly and depending on your hair type, should significantly straighten your hair for at least 30 days to as long as 3 months. To me, this sounds great. No more checking daily deal sites for a cheap Brazilian blowout, no possible formaldehyde poisoning, & best of all, you could even give yourself a world-class straightening from the comfort of your pajamas. How awesome is that? I’m no hairstylist, but this product looks easy enough to use.

KE (yes, we call each other by our initials now) looks like it provides the same straightening effects you can get from the Japanese straightening system and the Brazilian blowout, without the uberflat straightness and the possible formaldehyde fumes, respectively. KE works under essentially neutral conditions using a combination of mild ingredients and protecting, restructuring, and conditioning components.

The system is $99.95 through October, apparently, and it looks like its only for a 30-day supply. Seems a little steep for a month’s worth of straightening, but if it works and lasts longer than that, this could be a product that I soon become obsessed with. Can’t wait to try it! See for yourself here.

“I Would KILL For Straight Hair!”

How many of you curly-haired ladies have angrily shouted that at the mirror while going over your curly-ass roots for the third time because your stupid expensive-ass flat iron won’t straighten them all the way? Ass! God!!!

Here you go again, blaming me for your issues.

And then the Brazilian Blowout came along. It was advertised as “The Best Thing to Happen To Curly Hair” and “A Favorite of Celebrities,” which in layman terms, means its not currently affordable to 99.9% of the population. At $300 to $500 a pop, that’s definitely the case. However, thanks to daily deal sites like LivingSocial & GroupOn, I’ve been able to experience the magic of the 90 minute blowout for just a fraction of the cost, sometimes for as low as $99.


This picture isn’t an exaggeration. The Brazilian Blowout is really that goddamn magical, but no magical elixir comes without a steep price.

Just ask Harry Potter.

For a while now, the FDA has been warning consumers and stylists about the “funeral home level” of formaldehyde that is contained in the company’s products. Is it the absolute truth, or are lawmakers relying on scare-tactics to get their point across? I do not know. There’s too much politics involved for me to even know what the right decision is.

Some salons offer “formaldehyde-free” Brazilian blowouts, and even the original BB company themselves is pushing their new product called Brazilian Blowout Zero. I am all for the safety of our wonderful hair stylists and of course, it’s in everyone’s best interest to remain cancer-free. Hopefully these issues can get ironed out (HAIR PUN!) and everyone can go along on their merry way!

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